Hello. This is my first post in the Britney Forums, although i have been visting the forums for quite a while now and reading other posts. I am a big fan of Britney and her music, although i like a lot of other artists, especially r&b anfd rap orientated music.
The post i 'm writing today is not really about Britney, and i don't know if this is allowed, but please don't remove it.
It has taken a lot of courage to write this and i would be grateful if you could take the time to read it.
I'm 17, male and from the United Kingdom (Southport). I am very unhappy, to say the least.
I have no friends, and have never had any friends, not ones which i can rely on. Every person is my life who i've trusted has let me down. This is quite along post as i'm writing my full life story here, so i apologise for the space.
Basically, i have a syndrome, Aspergers' Syndrome, which is a form of autism. It affects me from communicating with other people, especially my age group. Therefore i have no friends. I went to a special school becuase of this, although no-one in my class knew my reasons why (It was a school for children with behavourial problems, everyone else was 'normal') There were 8 people in my clas, divided into 2 'groups' the cool group and the (not cool?) group. I was in the not cool group, although that is not the issue. When i was in primary school, i had a friend, Michael. We used to do stuff togther that wa snormal, e.g. hang out and i used to see him sometimes afetr school (you've got to understand that as i had no 'life' i never went out on my own outside the house as i was too scared due to my syndrome). However, after a while, Michael turned against me and started to call me names and make fun of me, mainly becuase at the time i had a problem with my back which made me look like a hunchback (This is corrected now after wearing a brace for a number of years). He was my only friend atthe time. He left when the end of primary came and i moved into the secondary department of this special school. It was there i met a boy called Shaun. It was a complete copy of Michael, we got along, we made friends and he didn't have many friends either, basically vecuase he was nasty to everyone. After a while though, he started, like Michael to shun me as he wanted to get into the 'cool' group. He would call me names, about my back, voice, anything he could think of to hurt me. What could i do to stop him? I called him names back (he was quite overeweight) to hope to stop him but it didn't work. Then, while Shaun was still around (he was in my class right up until the end of school) i met a boy called AAron (Shaun did not live near me so we never saw each ither outside of school, at this point i had no 'life' outside of school, which made the name calling all the worse, it wasn't as if i had friends outside of school i could turn to).
With Aaron it was the same story, friends at irst but he turned against me and called me names. That was it i had had no friends. They had all let me down.
So what happened next, i went to College. I hoped so much to make friends, but it hasn't happened. I feel so distant from everyone all the time. I have nothing in common with them (e.g. they all talkabout clubbing, drinking etc) I want to go out clubbing but have never had the hcance becuase i have noone to go with and i have not got the confidence to go on my own).
My depression ahs got so bad that i get upset over the slughrst thing and want to hurt anyone who makes me unhappy.
I just want to be loved, but when someone ins nasty to me thatlove turns to hate and i end up doping the nastiest things to them (e.g spread nasty rumors about them, destroy their college work etc). All i want is some friends and to have a life like other people.
Does anyone else feel like this? Please reply to this message if you do or e-mail me at
Cinnamon9000@aol.com
Thank you for reading.
Please help me, i am so unhappy. 
