Eternal Allegiance - Celebrity Gossip

Old 08-19-2002, 03:52 PM   #1
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Laughing Microsoft VS General Motors

At a computer expo, Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the car industry and stated, "If General Motors had kept us with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25.00 cars that got 1,000 miles to the gallon."

In response to Bill's comments, General Motors issued a press release stating:

If GM had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be driving cars with the following characteristics:

1. For no reason whatsoever, your car, would crash twice a day.

2. Every time they repainted the lines in the road, you would have to buy a new car.

3. Occasionally, your car would die on the freeway for no reason. You would have to pull over to the side of the road, close all of the windows, shut off the car, restart it, and reopen the windows before you could continue. For some reason you would simply accept this.

4. Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left turn would cause your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would have to reinstall the engine.

5. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, was reliable, five times as fast and twice as easy to drive -- but would run on only five percent of the roads.

6. The oil, water temperature, and alternator warning lights would all be replaced by a single "General Protection Fault" warning light.

7. The airbag system would ask, "Are you sure?" before deploying.

8. Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the key and grabbed hold of the radio antenna.

9. Every time GM introduced a new car, buyers would have to learn to drive all over again because none of the controls would operate in the same manner as the old car.

10. You'd have to press the "Start" button to turn the engine off.
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Old 08-19-2002, 09:35 PM   #2
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LOL!! So very true too.

Of course they forgot one: Linux would make a fully customizable car that would never crash and was free. However only a handful of people would use it and the rest would be afraid of it.
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Old 08-20-2002, 04:20 AM   #3
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LOL, thats absolutely funny Brant and so true
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Old 08-20-2002, 06:28 PM   #4
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I figured this was worth of a bump. Especially in mah forum.

Just as good as the others you post. I liked #7 the best.
7. The airbag system would ask, "Are you sure?" before deploying.
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Old 08-21-2002, 02:22 PM   #5
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Hehe at least a few people liked it.

Like Kat's one too...
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Old 08-22-2002, 09:31 PM   #6
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Oh, my! I've just got to print this!

- Emperor J.P.
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Old 08-22-2002, 09:40 PM   #7
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Glad you liked J.P.

How are you btw? Haven't seen you much... but then again neither have I been...
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Old 08-22-2002, 09:50 PM   #8
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School, unfortunately... I can't believe I survived Exam week!

- Emperor J.P.
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Old 08-22-2002, 09:54 PM   #9
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lol - well done then!

Didn't you just go on holidays though? Or do you have exams after holidays?
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Old 08-22-2002, 09:58 PM   #10
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Holidays? I did go to California in May, that was probably my last before school started in June.

- Emperor J.P.
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