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05-02-2003, 10:45 AM
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#1 | | Mikhail
Join Date: Jul 2002 Location: Frankfurt am Main
Posts: 10,137
|  McDonald's Resume | |
I found this extremely hilarious.
--- This kid will go far!!
This is an actual job application that a 17-year-old boy submitted at a McDonald's restaurant in Florida, and they hired him because he was honest and funny! NAME: Greg Bulmash
SEX: Not yet. Still waiting for the right person.
DESIRED POSITION: Company President or Vice President. But seriously, whatever's available. If I was in a position to be picky, I wouldn't be applying here in the firstplace.
DESIRED SALARY: $185,000 a year plus stock options and a Michael Ovitz style severance package. If that's not possible, make an offer and we can haggle.
EDUCATION: Yes.
LAST POSITION HELD: Target for middle management hostility.
SALARY: Less than I'm worth.
REASON FOR LEAVING: It sucked.
AVAILABLE TO WORK: Of course! That's what I'm applying.
PREFERRED HOURS: 1:30-3:30 p.m., Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday.
DO YOU HAVE ANY SPECIAL SKILLS?: Yes, but they're better suited to a more intimate environment.
MAY WE CONTACT YOUR CURRENT EMPLOYER?: If I had one, would I be here?
DO YOU HAVE ANY PHYSICAL CONDITIONS THAT WOULD PROHIBIT YOU FROM LIFTING UP TO 50 LBS?: Of what?
DO YOU HAVE A CAR?: I think the more appropriate question here would be "Do you have a car that runs?"
HAVE YOU RECEIVED ANY SPECIAL AWARDS OR RECOGNITION?: I may already be a winner of the Publishers Clearninghouse Sweepstakes.
DO YOU SMOKE?: On the job, no; on my breaks, yes.
WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE DOING IN FIVE YEARS?: Living in the Bahamas with a fabulously wealthy dumb sexy blonde super model who thinks I'm the greatest thing since sliced bread. Actually, I'd like to be doing that now.
DO YOU CERTIFY THAT THE ABOVE IS TRUE AND COMPLETE TO THE BEST OF YOUR KNOWLEDGE?: Yes. Absolutely.
SIGN HERE: Aries. | 
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05-02-2003, 10:47 AM
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#2 | | Gone
Join Date: Dec 2002
Posts: 25,649
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ROTFLMAO!! 
Hilarious. Thanks 4 Posting Mikey! | |
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05-02-2003, 10:57 AM
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#3 | | Paula C y Diego
Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: Venezuela
Posts: 5,940
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lmao!! that is so funny! | |
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05-02-2003, 11:01 AM
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#4 | | my prerogative
Join Date: Dec 2001 Location: México
Posts: 6,721
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LOL he's my hero!!!!!!!!!!!!
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05-02-2003, 01:41 PM
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#5 | | weeeee
Join Date: Oct 2001
Posts: 4,614
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LMAO yeah I've read that a loong time ago, it's funnay!!  | |
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05-02-2003, 02:16 PM
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#6 | | Alien Elf With Clogs
Join Date: Nov 2001
Posts: 6,346
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Well of COURSE he should be hired  | |
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05-02-2003, 02:50 PM
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#7 | | fix you
Join Date: Jan 2003
Posts: 3,674
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They really would hire someone like that. | |
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05-02-2003, 04:07 PM
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#8 | | Fifth Grader
Join Date: Apr 2001 Location: S/E London
Posts: 58
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kinda short for a resume.. dang.. which i could fill applications that short.
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I'm the first Latin Rapper to Baffle your skull/ Master the flow/ Niggaz be swearin' im Blacker than coal - BIG PUN - R.I.P | |
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05-02-2003, 04:29 PM
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#9 | | ~*~AngBoo~*~
Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: NYC
Posts: 2,394
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LOL, funny shit thanx for positng  | |
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05-02-2003, 07:36 PM
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#10 | | World Champion
Join Date: Aug 2002
Posts: 3,606
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LoL! That was sooooooooooooooo funny! LoL! I was cracking up | |
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