Crash Landing
Christina Aguilera is a little flighty in a bizarre birdbrained lavender Versace dress with a ruffle of feathers and lots of neck jewels. She also lays an egg with her unflattering shoe polish-colored hair and stenciled-in eyebrows. All we can say is, what the flock?
Smooth Operator
JC Chasez is one refined dude. He's suave in a light gray Valentino suit with funky Fendi shades and slightly scruffy hair. Does he dress differently depending on his performance? "Oh yeah, I always go classy when I'm singing a ballad," he says, clearly proving to the NFL he's no bad booby boy, like his naughty pal Justin.
The Wrong Stuff
Alicia Keys looks lost in space. Her sherbet-colored chiffon corset with long tails over white capri jeans is a disaster of cosmic proportions. "I had an idea for a jeans and dress combination," she says. Too bad she actually convinced Roberto Cavalli to make it. And those massive silver space-station earrings could shoot better spy photos than a Russian satellite. Ground control to Major Alicia!
Anchors Away
Gwen Stefani decks out in her new L.A.M.B. clothing line's '40s-style black 'n' white swirl-print satin halter and high-waisted black-buttoned white sailor pants, along with platform heels and long platinum locks. Her L.A.M.B. poster girl niece, Madeline, is decked out in a tank and plaid pants. You gotta give the gal credit. Gwen's found her favorite fashion era and she's sticking to it.
Innocent Bystander
Justin Timberlake cleans up his fashion act in a classic dark suit with a salmon-colored shirt and burgundy tie. Now, seriously, does this look like the raunchy and disrespectful young man who took part in that scandalous Super Bowl boob tube blunder? Precisely. And he arrived with Mom tonight to cement that impression! Awwwww...
Slim Pickin'
Ashanti exercises her right to party. She flashes her flesh in this pale belly-baring Roberto Cavalli satin gown with softly waved hair. Did she work out to get in shape for this revealingly ripe getup? "It was a bad morning," she admits, "I had some pancakes, but I did some crunches." Well, honey, they worked.
Designing Woman
Lil' Kim has a new line of jewelry and footwear, but if her fur-collared royal blue long/short satin gown, oversize diamond necklaces, chunky bracelets, orange hair and massive rhinestone ankle-cuffed stilettos are an indication of her style sense, she best keep her musical day job. Lil' girl, Donna Karan you're not.
How the West Was Worn
Queer Eye's rodeo queen Carson Kressley could be headed to the Grand Ole Opry. He lassos 'em in with this shiny silver-studded white western-style Roberto Cavalli jacket and pants. Hey, we don't care how fab this country boy is, if he starts crying in our beer, we're outta here.
Kidding Around
Sarah Jessica Parker is one problem child. She's a far cry from urban vixen in this blue one-piece skort-romper combo by Louis Vuitton with a single diamond broach pinned on the shoulder. Maybe she's been won over by all those onesies her baby boy is wearing? All we know, young lady, is that someone is in need of a time-out!
Gender Tango
Rock's royal couple Sting and Trudie Styler make an elegant style statement with daughter Koko. Styler is one haute mama in a black Chanel couture gown with platform shoes, and Koko follows suit in a flirty mini. But Sting proves he doesn't always need to wear the pants by pairing a sheer layered chiffon skirt with a black jacket and low-cut shirt. Okay, but who does the dishes?
Pecking Order
Mary J. Blige is poised and ready to dance the Funky Chicken. She's caught in Gucci's canary yellow shimmery minidress and fine feathered crop jacket. We hate to say it, but this dress is a close runner-up to Björk's much maligned Oscar swan dress--okay, minus the beak. Big Bird would be so proud.
Freeze Frame
Jennifer Love Hewitt gets a chilly reception on the red carpet. She's oh so underdressed in a strapless red Armani gown accented by small sparkly diamond earrings and tacky plastic shoes. "I'm not usually a color person, so I feel a little bold," she says. We're surprised she doesn't feel a little, um, cold. Quick, someone get her a blanket.
Refuse the Refuse
Billy Bob Thornton talks some trash in a "Fashion Stinks" T-shirt, a nasty wool hat, worn 'n' torn jeans and armloads of tattoos. But the grungy attire makes him look like he should be out back in his shed and not at some glam awards show.
Creature of Comfort
Queen Latifah is the epitome of casual cool. She rules in a bright green satin top with a long trail, a snug and sexy bust line, black leather pants and loads of sparkling diamonds. This is one diva who knows how to dress with ease without losing her glamorous edge. Billy Bob, take note!
In Full Bloom
Madonna springs into action with husband Guy Ritchie. She's a fuchsia dream in a sexy satin Versace gown and Dolce & Gabbana black spike boots. Guy keeps cool in a dark blue suit, but our attention's on Lady Madonna, who finally doffs the frumpy frocks of late. And we just love the new long, straight locks. She's out with the Britney and in with the new!
Weary Wear
Paula Abdul is one tired sweet tart. She wears a tight tangerine Herve Leger gown with a muted green antique necklace, matching bracelets and lighter, shorter blond-tipped hair. Has all that American Idolatry taken its toll? Maybe Paula needs a break from the bad singing. Lord knows we do.
Maternal Instincts
Okay, what girl in her right mind would let a relative make her Grammy dress? Not us! But Beyoncé Knowles gets the gold for a strapless metallic gown designed by mom Tina Knowles for B's brand-new couture clothing line. At least in Beyoncé's case, mother really does know best.
Fashion Police: Grammys 2004 
Where's Kelly! 
but I do like JC's and Beyoncé's minus the color. I guess the gold fit her though 
But it completely works on her, I think. She's like the only person on the planet who could wear that and make it look okay.
