RAW Results September 29th:
The fireworks went off in the arena for the start of RAW and Jonathan Coachman and Al Snow kicked the show off on commentary! Tonight, we'll see Rob Van Dam get a shot at the Intercontinental Championship against Christian in a Ladder Match! Plus, Jonathan Coachman will meet Jim Ross in a one on one match to determine the RAW announce team. Also, Goldberg and Shawn Michaels will battle Ric Flair and Randy Orton in tag team action!
Lilian Garcia introduced the RAW announce team, Al Snow and The Coach and the fans booed them as they stood up and acted as if the fans love them. Chris Jericho's music then hit in the arena and he made his way out to the ring followed by the Co General Manager of RAW, Eric Bischoff and the two made their way to the ring where the Highlight Reel was set up.
Chris took the mic and said to look at all the people here tonight! But before we get started, his close personal friend Mr. Eric Bischoff has a very important announcement that he needs to make. Eric told everybody to pay attention because due to the physical attack last week by Stone Cold Steve Austin on Eric Bischoff, an attack that was totally unprovoked he might add, the board of directors have decided to suspend Stone Cold Steve Austin for one week, therefore there will be no Rattlesnake on RAW tonight. Now on with the Highlight Reel!
Chris Jericho took the mic and the fans chanted "you suck, you suck" and Chris said that they don't care what the fans think, Eric Bischoff does not suck. But Chris thinks that Eric let that stupid son of a bitch Austin off too lightly. Not only did he punch Eric Bischoff for no reason but even worse, he cost Chris Jericho the title against Goldberg last week. That title was his and he can beat Goldberg! All the ass-clowns liked that, didn't they? Chris said he doesn't know who makes him more sick, his guest or the fans. And his guest tonight is a man who's getting a second chance to regain his job if he can beat The Coach tonight. Ladies and Gentlemen, his guest, Good old JR!
Jim Ross came out to the ring and Eric Bischoff told Chris to hold on a second. He's going to let JR in on something. We all know that the right to broadcast RAW is on the line here tonight and since Stone Cold Steve Austin saw fit to make that rematch, being the fair General Manager that he is, he thinks it's only fair that Coach gets to decide just what kind of match that's going to be! Coach stood up and he said he thought Eric would never ask but now that he mentions it, right off the top of his head, he always wondered what it would be like to whoop JR's ass like a Government mule. So hear him out here, if Bischoff doesn't mind, why don't they make tonight's match a good old Country Whipping match! Bischoff said that he likes that and Chris pointed out that JR's back is still healing from when Kane burnt him. Jericho then made a mockery of Jim Ross being burnt and Bischoff said that Chris is right and as General Manager, compassion is what makes him a success. So he has to take all things into consideration, so Coach, he absolutely agrees! Eric then asked Ross what he thinks of that and then he referred to him as a Cowboy. Jim Ross said that he thinks they better pray he wins tonight because Coach and Al Snow are just like Eric Bischoff; they suck!
Eric Bischoff and Jim Ross got in a mini shoving contest and Chris Jericho pointed out that Eric Bischoff can't physically touch the talent, but Chris Jericho can! Chris then knocked Jim Ross down to the mat and then put him in the Walls of Jericho.
Stone Cold Steve Austin's music hit in the arena and he stormed to the ring, scaring Chris Jericho and Eric Bischoff out of the ring and he destroyed the Highlight Reel set, tossing things around and even tossing one of the chairs at Eric Bischoff. Eric Bischoff took the mic on the ramp and he asked Austin what the hell he thinks he's doing here? He's not supposed to be here. Austin told Bischoff to shut up and he said that he knows he's suspended and he knew Bischoff was going to try something like this, so that's why Austin is here so they don't get away with it. Eric said congratulations, but it's time for Austin to get the hell out of the ring. Bischoff then called for security and told them to get that Redneck piece of trash out of here. Security got in the ring and grabbed Austin and Austin told them to be careful because that's his drinking arm. And that's his other drinking arm. Austin said that he understands they have a job to do but as many times as he's been to this arena, he thinks he can find his way out himself.
Austin then asked them to release him so he can calmly remove himself. Austin then said he appreciates their understanding and then he laid them both out, giving one the Stone Cold Stunner!
Stone Cold was shown in the parking lot and he was pacing back and forth as he's been banned from the arena. Austin flipped off security as Coach bragged about how he's going to beat Jim Ross later tonight.
Tag Team Championship Match - Test and Scott Steiner vs. the Dudley Boyz
The music of the Dudley Boyz hit in the arena and they made their way out to the ring as the Tag Team Champions for a title defense against Test and his man-whore, Scott Steiner.
Scott Steiner started it off in the ring but he immediately tagged Test into the ring and then Bubba pulled Test into the ring with a hip toss. Bubba then hammered away on Test, whipping him into the corner and squashing him with an avalanche.
Test went to tag in Scott Steiner and Scott stepped back and then Bubba Ray rolled Test up in a pin for a two count.
Test went for the pump handle slam but Bubba Ray got out of it and gave him a body slam. Bubba then held onto Test's legs and D-Von went to the top rope but Test hit Bubba in the groin and then he shoved Nick Patrick into the ropes to knock D-Von down.
Test planted D-Von Dudley with the pump handle slam and then he pinned him but only got a two count as Scott Steiner pulled Test off him. An angered Test then got out of the ring and grabbed a steel chair and went to use it on D-Von but Stacy got in the ring and grabbed the chair from him. Test then shoved Stacy down to the mat and then Bubba gave him the Bubba Bomb as Stacy held her chest on the mat.
Test set up for the big boot but Stacy Keibler tapped him on the shoulder and hit him with the steel chair and then the Dudley Boyz gave him the 3D to pick up the win and retain the titles!
Stacy Keibler got in the ring and laughed at Test and then he grabbed her by the throat and Steiner laid Test out from behind. Stacy then clapped as Steiner took the mic. Steiner told Stacy that she screwed him again and he knows that she isn't going to ask for her forgiveness. But what about Steiner? Does she want to know if he forgives her because after all, she did cost him the match at Unforgiven and did just cost him the World Tag Team Titles. And now she wants to know if he'll forgive her... hell no!
Stacy Keibler then tried to run off but Scott Steiner grabbed her by the hair and pulled her in.
Then giving her a belly to belly suplex. When Test noticed what happened, he looked extremely happy and surprised.
Referees and Trainers came out and assisted Stacy Keibler to the backstage area.
Kane's music hit in the arena and he made his way out to the ring. Kane got in the ring and took the mic, referring to Shane McMahon. Kane said that last week, he tasted Shane's blood and he liked it. He saw the terror in his eyes when he attacked him in that hospital and he liked that too. Hell, he loved it! Shane is exactly right when he says that this isn't over; no, this is just the beginning because it doesn't matter if it's a hospital...
The Hurricane's music hit in the arena and he made his way out as the former tag team partner of Kane. The Hurricane took the mic and said that he has a question for Kane; does he remember 'this.' The Hurricane pointed to the Titantron where Kane and the Hurricane became the Tag Team Champions last year by defeating Lance Storm and Christian. The Hurricane said that in less than a year, Kane went from being a beloved favorite to a psychopathic monster. What, Kane, is up with that? Kane told the Hurricane to listen to him; he represents everything that the Hurricane used to hate about himself. He's dedicated his life to pleasing these people! Hurricane wants to know why Kane became a monster? Why doesn't he come to the ring and find out? The Hurricane said that he was Kane's friend, he doesn't want to fight him, he just wants to know why. Kane said that if he doesn't want to fight him, then he'll have to find someone else. Who's it going to be?
Kane then looked into the audience, looking for someone to fight and he saw a kid in the front row wearing a Hurricane mask. Kane asked the kid if his parents have ever told him that there's no such thing as a monster? Well they lied! Kane thinks that the kid needs to feel Kane's pain. Kane got out of the ring and went towards the kid but the Hurricane stormed to the ringside area and jumped Kane at ringside and hammered away on him until Kane nailed the Hurricane with an upper cut. Kane then launched the Hurricane into the steel ring post and then brought him into the ring and gave him a big boot. Kane grabbed the Hurricane by the throat and was about to choke slam him but Rosey came out and made the save. Kane went to choke slam Rosey but the Hurricane and Rosey double teamed Kane, sending him to the outside of the ring!
Garrison Cade and Mark Jindrak were shown playing Wrestlemania XIX on Gamecube and Maven showed up and the three started talking until La Resistance showed up and dissed them on how they prepare for their match.
The two sides argued and Garrison Cade told them that if they lay down tonight like France did in World War 2, the night is going to go pretty quick. Maven told La Resistance that they know about laying down, just like they lost their tag team titles! La Resistance yelled at Maven, referring to him as Chris Rock based on his comedy.
Six Man Tag Team Match - Rob Conway and La Resistance vs. Maven, Garrison Cade and Mark Jindrak
La Resistance and Rob Conway made their way out to the ring for a six man tag team match against Garrison Cade, Mark Jindrak and Maven.
Maven, Cade and Jindrak got in the ring and all six men went at it in the ring with everyone being dumped to the outside of the ring except Garrison Cade and Rene Dupree.
Rob Conway nailed Garrison Cade in the back of the head with the French Flag and then Rene Dupree hammered away on Garrison Cade.
Maven came off the top rope with a cross body on Rob Conway and then he nailed Rene Dupree with a drop kick and then knocked Sylvan Grenier off the apron by pulling his head onto the ropes bouncing him back to the arena floor.
Sylvan Grenier and Rene Dupree gave Maven the double team spinebuster and then Mark Jindrak got in the ring and hammered away on La Resistance.
Rob Conway went for the neck breaker but it was countered and then Garrison Cade lifted Rob Conway up and Mark Jindrak nailed him with a drop kick to send him down to the mat, allowing the team of Maven, Jindrak and Cade to pick up the win.
Stone Cold was shown in the parking lot and he was talking to the security guards, saying that he wants a beer. Rob Van Dam showed up and he said that they told him that he could find Austin out here. It sucks that he got thrown out of RAW, but he set up this match tonight with Christian and he wanted to thank Austin. Austin said there's no need for that, just kick the Creepy Little Bastard's ass. Rob said that he will, for Austin. Austin asked security if he could go to the bathroom and they said no. A big guy named John Heidenrich showed up and he said that he never imagined that he'd be standing in front of Stone Cold Steve Austin. He worked all his life to become a WWE Superstar and he bought a ticket to meet Stone Cold.
Stone Cold shook the guy's hand and said it was nice to meet him. Austin then brought the guy aside to have a little talk.
Triple H was shown in Stamford, Connecticut and he was clapping. He started off by congratulating Bill Goldberg, the World Heavyweight Champion. Congratulations, he's made it one week. Has he learned yet that it's a lot harder to stay on top than to get to the top? Has he realized that everyone is after him? Has the paranoia kicked in yet? It should be because he's walking around with a huge target around his waist and everybody wants to take that World Heavyweight Championship; Triple H's World Heavyweight Championship. Goldberg has a lot to learn as a Champion and not a lot of time to learn it in because very shortly, he will take back what is his. But he is going to help Goldberg speed up the learning process. See, he was thinking to himself; could you imagine if he had a dollar for every time he heard someone chant his name. And then he thought to himself, he does! And the thing about him is that he's a generous guy. He likes to give, so he's going to take some of that money and he's going to use it to help Goldberg learn his lesson. This is 100,000 dollars of his own money and he is offering it to anyone within the sound of his voice that takes out Bill Goldberg.
All they have to do is put Goldberg on the shelf. He doesn't care where it is, it can be in a parking lot, gas station, in the back or in the ring. He doesn't care who it is. Man, woman, makes no difference. You put Goldberg away and you get 100,000 dollars. Triple H said that he told Goldberg last week that the game was just starting and it looks to him like the game just got a whole lot more interesting.
Jim Ross was shown backstage and he was getting prepared for his match against Coach, next!
Country Whipping Match - Jonathan Coachman vs. Jim Ross
Lilian Garcia announced the next match as a Country Whipping Match to determine the RAW announce team. Both men can use the straps, but you must win the match by pinfall or submission and this is Jonathan Coachman against Jim Ross! As the referee explained the rules, Chris Jericho's music hit in the arena and he made his way out to the announce booth to help out Al Snow on commentary.
The match started with Jim Ross whipping Coach with the leather strap to send him out of the ring.
The Coach whaled away on Jim Ross but Ross fought back by giving Coach a low blow.
Eric Bischoff came out and started to get in the ring but Jim Ross whipped him to send him out of the ring.
Jim Ross gave The Coach the Stone Cold Stunner and then he pinned Coach for the three count to get the win to regain his spot in the announce booth!
Jerry Lawler's music hit and he made his way out to the ring, happy that he and Jim Ross are returning to the announce booth for RAW.
Stone Cold Steve Austin came through the crowd with a ticket and he hopped the rail and got in the ring and raised JR's hand. Austin said that he's not saying this as Co General Manager; since he got a ticket, he's saying this as a fan, welcome back Jerry "The King" Lawler and welcome back Good Old Jim Ross, JR! Austin has four words to say; I'll drink to that, bring some damn beers!
Jim Ross and Jerry Lawler rejoined the announce booth and they're glad to be back. They immediately started talking about Wrestlemania XX and tickets went on sale this past weekend and it sold out. Wrestlemania XX will emanate from Madison Square Garden on March 14th.
In the ring, Terri said that there's only one word to describe the diva she's about to introduce and that is Lita! Lita's music then hit in the arena and she made her way out to the ring as Terri held Lita's book in her hand. Terri said that before they begin, while Lita was out with a broken neck, not only did she find time to start her own animal rescue organization but she also spent time to write her own autobiography and it is available tomorrow. Terri asked Lita how it feels to be back? Lita said that she has to start by saying 'what's up, Chicago?'
Lita said yes, she had a broken neck but she doesn't want to talk about it anymore or hear about it anymore. She is so past that. If she was not ready to be here, then she wouldn't be here so like it or not, she's back. And nothing is going to stop her from...
Molly Holly and Gail Kim made their way out to the ring with Molly as the WWE Women's Champion. Molly took the mic from Terri and Gail took the book from her. Molly said first Trish Stratus gets a new DVD and now Lita has a book? Where's Gail's DVD and Molly's book? Where's their respect? Molly is the Women's Champion for crying out loud. Lita's comeback is about to be the shortest in WWE history. Gail Kim then nailed Lita in the back of the head with her book and then she hammered away on her as she was down on the mat.
Molly then joined in on dominating Lita until Trish Stratus made her way out to the ring to make the save for Lita. Victoria made her way out and pulled Trish down and then nailed Lita. Victoria then gave Trish Stratus the Widow's Peak and then Gail and Molly gave Lita a double team DDT, dropping her right on her head. Molly grabbed Lita's book and stood over Lita and tore the pages and tossed them down on Lita.
